420 ftw
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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