I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
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I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
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I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
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