he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you donโt have to recycle anymore ๐๐
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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