I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
