im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
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