"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
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