everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Randomize
