I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize
