i'm signing you up for texting rehab
id be glad to
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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