I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
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