I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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