he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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