So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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