how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Randomize
