You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
