i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
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