I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Randomize