Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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