Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
