You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
