yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize
