I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
