What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize