So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
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