I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
