She said her name was "party"
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize
