I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize