going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
