I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
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