I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
