We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
