I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
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Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
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Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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