i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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