i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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