Texts From Last Night

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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.

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  (732): You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant. http://tfl.nu/c7ag
  Replies (23) Good night (3265) Bad night (609)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left

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  (201): yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left http://tfl.nu/1ikl
  Replies (7) Good night (674) Bad night (3708)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.

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  (732): I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it. http://tfl.nu/eqvw
  Replies (66) Good night (1847) Bad night (3877)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial

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  (404): Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial http://tfl.nu/i0mg
  Replies (27) Good night (4764) Bad night (692)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....

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  (317): he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal..... http://tfl.nu/xm36
  Replies (29) Good night (6579) Bad night (1503)
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  (316): View more from Kansas

  I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.

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  (316): I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back. http://tfl.nu/cqa8
  Replies (42) Good night (5196) Bad night (1704)
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free

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  (734): It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free http://tfl.nu/3j31
  Replies (8) Good night (4506) Bad night (1574)
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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?

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  (701): Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire? http://tfl.nu/pmju
  Replies (3) Good night (1475) Bad night (2009)
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  (915): View more from Texas

  at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?

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  (915): at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes? http://tfl.nu/vnu1
  Replies (3) Good night (2603) Bad night (1475)
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  (925): View more from California

  it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.

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  (925): it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night. http://tfl.nu/nvwn
  Replies (10) Good night (1262) Bad night (1954)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday

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  (614): Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday http://tfl.nu/2snx
  Replies (3) Good night (929) Bad night (1950)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.

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  (717): And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes. http://tfl.nu/hx7l
  Replies (10) Good night (860) Bad night (484)
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  (315): View more from New York

  we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?

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  (315): we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered? http://tfl.nu/k5ls
  Replies (10) Good night (712) Bad night (370)
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.

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  (902): It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch. http://tfl.nu/pix9
  Replies (2) Good night (549) Bad night (311)
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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..

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  (250): doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments.. http://tfl.nu/pw8d
  Replies (2) Good night (504) Bad night (299)

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