didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
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Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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