have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
