in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Randomize
