So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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