the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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