haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize