So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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