Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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