dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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