We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
