Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Randomize
