We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
