Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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