I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
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