brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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