That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Randomize